Prank Gone Wrong

We all know that being a teen is a lot of fun sometimes, and we always know that we like to have fun. If you live in a small ass town, where honestly there is nothing to do, you sometimes have to make fun happen more than others. Ding Dong Ditch is a fun harmful prank that I know many many people have done, including me, and probably my parents as well. No one would think that a little silly prank, that yes is annoying, would turn into someone being killed.

Early this morning, two young men were walking home and decided they were going to play ding dong ditch. At one point the boys apperantly rang the doorbell of a Sarasota country officer, CarlosVerdoni, and ran. According the newspapers, they did this at midnight, and then returned an hour later to do it again. Somehow that seems very fishy to me, but that’s my opinion. The second time the off duty officer got into his patrol car and followed the boys as they ran down the road. Apperantly there was a scruffle and lots of yelling where Tyler Spann was not complying and attacked the officer and went for his gun. (really somehow this doesn’t seem possible, and I think is murky). The officer fearing for his life then shot two bullets into Tyler, killing him at the scene. Now I can understand the officer being upset that maybe these kids woke up his baby, but in a news report, saying he was fearing for his family and their safety. Really, because you just got into your car and LEFT your family ALONE. If there was another two kids who were watching behind trees or something, you just left your house alone and empty, and in perfect condition for them to come in.

Being a cop himself, Carlos should have called in the report, and left it at that. Even if he followed them to were their house was, and sat there and waited for the cops to show up, that would have been more logical to me. I know there is a big debate because as a officer, your not suppose to deal with anything within one mile of your home radius and or your own disputes. I don’t know, something just feels hinky with this story. I’ll be interested to see how the investigation plays out. In the meantime, my thoughts and prayers are with the family of Tyler Spann and his whole town who is going through a huge loss.

Here is another blog speaking of the same issue  http://amomandherblog.com/?p=1675 and if you want to read the newspaper reports, all you have to type in is Tyler Spann.

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So it honestly just feels like another day, and I know I should be happy and honored that this is another day in the life of me, but at the same time, I am like BLAH today. My head is pounding, my back is killing me, I don’ sleep as well as I used too. I hate being a tummy sleeper, and now that I am pregnant, I am not able to now

As of today, I am just shy of 16 weeks pregnant, which is crazy to think, because in 20 weeks or so, I could have this kid, lol. Mike and I are still waiting to find out blue or pink. I want blue, he wants pink, but really we just want healthy.

Mike has been stressing about money, which is totally understandable, and I feel horrible. As I am not working, I feel like I am not doing as much, or providing as much as he is. I did go on an interview yesterday for a job which would only be 10 hours a week, but that’s better than nothing. I honestly hope I get it, because then that little extra for the next 5/6 months will be a big thing, and IT IS something I could do AFTER the baby since it’s only 10 hours a week. I guess we will have to wait and see what happens.

Other than all that, life is just life. We got the nursery completed finished. I got the guest bedroom closet and the office closet organized. Mike finished up the bathroom painting and family room touch ups. So we are getting our (big ass house) together finally!

Songs to make you think

So I asked my husband what I should write about today, and he said yards. I was like, ummm okay? I really can’t say I know a lot about yards. You have to mow them, rake them and so forth. I know ours is currently more brown than green, but that’s okay. Since I can’t really say I have much else to right about yards, I am going to write about music. I love music, and not just one kind of music. I am an eclectic kind of girl. Like my mp3 player goes from gospel, country to icp, ozzie and then to Miley Cyrus. I just love music, the beat, the sounds, the range in voices and instruments.

As a stay at home wife (soon to be mom), I know my job is more to keep the house clean and maintained, which I do. I know sometimes I do slack, but for the most part, I do well. As I am cleaning, organizing or whatever I am doing, I am always listening to music. One of the newer songs they have been playing on the radio I personally LOVE and am going to share it, and then tell you why it’s such a powerful song.

Kris Allen’s – Live Like We’re Dying

Sometimes we fall down and can’t get back up
We’re hiding behind skin that’s too tough
How come we don’t say I love you enough
Till it’s to late, it’s not too late

Our hearts are hungry for a food that won’t come
We could make a feast from these crumbs
And we’re all staring down the barrel of a gun
So if your life flashed before you
What would you wish you would’ve done

Yeah… gotta start
Lookin at the hand of the time we’ve been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start pickin it
Every second counts on a clock that’s tickin’
Gotta live like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

And if your plane fell out of the skies
Who would you call with your last goodbyes
Should be so careful who we live out our lives
So when we long for absolution
There’ll no one on the line

Yeah… gotta start
Lookin at the hand of the time we’ve been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start pickin it
Every second counts on a clock that’s tickin’
Gotta live like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

Like we’re dying oh – like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live – like we’re dying

We never know a good thing till it’s gone
You never see a crash until it’s head on
All those people right when we’re dead wrong
You never know a good thing till it’s gone

Yeah… gotta start
Lookin at the hand of the time we’ve been given here
This is all we got and we gotta start livin it
Every second counts on a clock that’s tickin’
Gotta live like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying

Like we’re dying oh – like we’re dying

We only got
86 400 seconds in a day to
Turn it all around or throw it all away
We gotta tell ‘em that we love ‘em
While we got the chance to say
Gotta live like we’re dying
Live like we’re dyin

Okay, so as I am listening to it right now. I am thinking about my life and everyone in it, and it makes me smile. In my opinion, I think this song is all about enjoying each moment and making the most of your life, because you really never know what is going to happen in it. “So if your life flashed before you, What would you wish you would’ve done”. That is probably one of my favorite parts of the song, because I always try to live by the motto of having no regrets in life. There was a time in my life that I thought I had done some horrible things, and had horrible things happen to me because of what I did, but then I met an amazing man (my hubby) and he made me realize that yes bad things have happened to me, and they are still going to, but it isn’t because of something I did or am going to do. It is all just how life plays out. So now you have 86,400 seconds (well maybe not that long as it’s in the afternoon) to do what you want to do today, so what are you going to do? I this part “ And if your plane fell out of the skies, Who would you call with your last goodbyes, Should be so careful who we live out our lives, So when we long for absolution, There’ll no one on the line” is just a big reminder of not burning bridges. It’s like the old saying, *Some people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you know which it is, you will know what to do for that person.*

After having a wedding, buying a house, and now about to have a baby, I have truly learned who my lifetime friends are. I do have part-time friends (who I would say are my seasonal friends), and I will always be there for them if they ever need me, but I am more weary of them due to the fact I know they are only my friend if and when they need something. Oh well, I guess that is just part of how life goes.

Anyways, I think I am done for now. My cats are biting each other and annoying me, so til next time, live your life to the fullest!

What would you do?

As many of you know, I am currently pregnant. Most days I don’t eat more than I would if I wasn’t. The only think I have really noticed is I drink more, and I eat lighter meals with more snacks, which is a good thing. Today I don’t feel pregnant, but I know I am still in the early stages on it, and due to being overweight, it also takes more time for my body to show.

Last night my husband was asking me about if I had a miscarriage, how I would feel. I told him I wouldn’t be upset with anyone, because it is part of life, and obviously the man upstairs says it’s not the right time for us. I would be depressed for something because this little thing was growing inside of me, and is a part of my husband and I, and now just isn’t there, but it would be a part of life and we would deal.

I know a BIG reason that after blood work confirmed we were pregnant we told people (or I know I did) was because if we did have to do through that ordeal, I would want, and need to support from everyone and anyone I could get. I know most people wait til they are at the point I am now. Where your past the miscarriage stage, and just about to hit your 3rd month and 2nd trimester. I know I could have waited, but I didn’t want to incase we had any issues. I know I would rather people know early and be there to support me, than no one knowing and having to deal alone.

Speaking of where I am in my pregnancy, I have an appointment in like 10 days and this will be the first of two tests (consisting of blood work and ultrasound) to see about genetic defects. They test for a few different conditions. The one big one is to determine is the child carries the extra chromosomes to be affect by Down Syndrome, which is a condition that affects them in many ways and later on in life can lead to more diseases and illness if they make it to their adult life. The second big thing they test for is Spina Bifida which is problem where the spine hasn’t fused closed properly. There are two other things they check for, one being Cystic Fibrosis which occurs in 1 in 2,500 children born in the United States. CF causes lung, intestinal and pancreatic ailments, which results in numerous extensive hospital stays, and a shortened life expectancy.  The last thing they test for is Tay-Sachs, which is a devastating and untreatable neurological condition that leads to death in early childhood. They say that around 5 months old, the child will start to lose motor skills, then later develop seizures. Death normally occurs around 4 to 5 years of age.

So last night my husband and I were speaking on these tests I will be having done, and what it means for us. If we found out our child had any of these conditions, would be choose to keep it and know that unlike most children, we would either be responsible long after their 18th birthday, or lose them before their 6th birthday. Or would we go the route that neither of truly believe in, and abort and try again. I am not sure honestly what I would do if I had to pick today. I know I would need some time to think everything out, and talk to people, but it would be a hard choice either way. Like Mike my husband said, which one is worst? Aborting a baby now knowing it could die before their 6th birthday, or having a child with a condition that could and probably would tear our marriage apart and raising that child well past their 18th birthday. I don’t know what the right choice is, but I would love to hear your opinion on it.

feeding an army?

Well this evening, my hubby and I went over to my grandparents house for dinner and so hubby could help grandpa set up his new computer. I have to say for being 78, my grandfather actually knows more about computers and such than some 40 year olds.

I love my grandmother. She is a little Italian lady with a heart of gold. The only problem with her, is she OVER cooks by a lot. I will share with you tonight’s dinner. She had 4 pieces of chicken on the bone (big pieces), 4 baked potatoes, 4 pieces of corn on the cob, soup, salad, and a brocolli mixture, along with homemade bread. Now when I think about all the food, I think about having 6-8 people over to eat it. Mike and I normally share a piece of chicken, and I am not a big potato fan. Plus she made soup, my biggest weakness, and then she still thinks I need to eat one of each of the items she made. I think not

Don’t get me wrong, her food it amazing, but it is just so much food. After everyone was done eating, we still had 2 bowls of soup left, 2 pieces out 4 of chicken, 2 out of 4 of the bread, one corn on the cob left, 1 potato left and half the salad and brocolli mixture. Now I did take the soup home, and she also sent me home with homemade pizza, but that will be dinner probably Friday night.

Even though I am pregnant, I am not eating for 6. No wonder when people come down they always want to go to Grandmas for dinner. She makes incredible food, but if you go there once a week, you start to look like our Italian family                Oh well, it is all good.

good news, bad timing?

I went to the doctors on Jan 26., because something just wasn’t right with this body of mine. She took some blood and it came back that I was like 5 weeks pregnant. I was excited, but nervous at the same time. It is an amazing feeling to know that Mike and I created this little thing, but at the same time with the economy and everything, it is a little scary to know we are going to be bringing another little person into this world.

Yesterday I had my first real appointment with the doctor. I was so nervous about it as I didn’t know what was going to happen and what was going to happen. Well I spoke with the doctor, got bloodwork done, and had my first ultrasound and see a photo of the baby. I also heart the heartbeat, 180 a minute, YAY!!!! Honestly as soon as I seen the picture of this little thing, my heart just melted and it was over from there.

When I showed Mike, he seemed happy, but I am not sure. I think he is still really worried, which he has every right to be, but I just wish he would see the photo and show a little more happiness. Oh well, I understand, and am just going to enjoy this process and make the best of everything I can.

I love my family, my cats, my hubby and this little thing inside that is going to be here before we know it.

Life

Where to start and where to end. Life is this weird thing that always is there, and at times you wish wasn’t because it gets too hard and becomes too much. Life is full of ups, and downs. Full of what ifs and whos not. Life is making mistakes, and jumping on for the ride. Life is truly what you make it, and sometimes what you make it is a living hell. Life is this magical thing, and one day, you wake up and realize your life has been wasted, and you have to start anew to get it back and make it the best.

I know I woke up the other morning and thought, what the hell have I done. I knew what the consequences would be that morning, and I got everything I deserved and more. I made a mistake, and I can’t take it back. I wish I could, but I can’t. Yes those old memories do make me smile and make me laugh. I had some good times in the past, and I also had some really horrible ones. My past is filled with heartache and pain, and that is not what I want to bring into my future, into yours, or into our childs. I want to be the happy you love and know. Yes I am going to have moments where I am sad, or down, but for so long now I haven’t been depressed because I have you in my life. I have been so happy, and so lucky to have you, and it’s such an amazing feeling to know that no matter what happens, or what I go thought, that I always have someone who will support me and tell me the truth, and I thank you for that.

I love you, I love you so much. You are my rock, you are my everything. I know we have had fights, and we are always going to. That is part of life, that is part of growing up, and it is a big part of relationships. Anyone who says the are married and they don’t fight, they are just lying to you and themselves. I am sorry for the mistake I made. I didn’t see that past moment, that past drawing in the little picture. The girl sitting alone half hearted. I seen it as the big picture. I seen it as the girl who can be independent, the girl who aims for the moon because even if she failed, she would be among the stars. I am sorry I hurt you. I am sorry it was mistaken. I just seen it as a symbol of who I used to be, and it bought back some memories, some good, and some bad, but mostly it made me see the girl in the photo for the amazing person she was, and still is deep down inside.

“…I never promised you a ray of light, I never promised there’d be sunshine everyday, I give you everything I have, the good, the bad… I always said that I would make mistakes, I’m only human, and that’s my saving grace, I fall as hard as I try, so don’t be blinded, see me as I really am, I have flaws and sometimes I even sin, so pull me from that pedestal, because I don’t belong up there…”

Marriage

One of my newly engaged friends asked me why I enjoyed being married and my answer was simple, very simple. I said in one word, support. Yes, I said it, my reason for loving being married is support. I love knowing that no matter what my choice is that my husband will support me, and help me achieve whatever I want.
I know for me that getting married was one of the best decisions I have ever made, and I am truly still in love with him. Some benefits of being married is that you live longer. You always have someone to talk to, and to listen to you. You get sex. Well, initially. This decreases over time, which is to be expected with any relationship, not just a marriage. You get more back in taxes, which is always a nice benefit in April.
I guess to everyone a marriage is a different thing, but to me it’s a long life commitment to each other that you vow to always be there for each other, no matter how bad the situation can become. Because if you can make it up from rock bottom with that person beside you, then you can make it to hell and back … so good luck :p

Old-Person-Ville

YAY!!! I live in old person ville, where sometimes I honestly think people come to pass on. But that is okay for me. Because in two weeks I start school classes to get my nursing assistant degree. Yes, I know it really is just a piece of paper that says “hey I passed the states guidelines”, but it is a big deal.

I am super excited because where I live, it means a great job, plus it’s one of those careers that will never really not be there.

Friendship? What are you?

I guess to everyone a friendship is a different thing, but to me, I know exactly what it means. Friendship is a very deep and amazing connection. It is this in-depth connection (relationship) that combines trust, support, communication, loyalty, understanding, empathy and intimacy. It is a lot like a marriage.

Someone once explained a friendship as the feeling you have from returning from your grandmothers house after the weekend is over. You finally get back to your own house, and you feel, hey this is home, this is relaxing, this is right, and that is what a friendship should be. It should be your comfort, and it should be a good part of your life, and make you amazing. You go out into the world, you do your best, and you have you ups and downs. You have problems, you have triumphs, fun and tribulations, and after everything you come (home) to that friend, that one that you can share everything with, and doesn’t question anything.

But no one can form a friendship with another person until they are friends with themselves. Also no one can be a friend to someone else, until they know what that other person needs from them. It’s like that old poem, everyone comes into your life for a reason. Some stay for a few minutes, others for a few days, and some forever, and they are always there for a reason, and sometimes we don’t know that reason, but we are so thankful they are there for as long as they are there for.

So thank you to all my friends, to all those amazing people who inspired me, and who made me who I am. I love you all, and you all are awesome, and I couldn’t or wouldn’t be who i am without you. I love you all.