What would you do?

As many of you know, I am currently pregnant. Most days I don’t eat more than I would if I wasn’t. The only think I have really noticed is I drink more, and I eat lighter meals with more snacks, which is a good thing. Today I don’t feel pregnant, but I know I am still in the early stages on it, and due to being overweight, it also takes more time for my body to show.

Last night my husband was asking me about if I had a miscarriage, how I would feel. I told him I wouldn’t be upset with anyone, because it is part of life, and obviously the man upstairs says it’s not the right time for us. I would be depressed for something because this little thing was growing inside of me, and is a part of my husband and I, and now just isn’t there, but it would be a part of life and we would deal.

I know a BIG reason that after blood work confirmed we were pregnant we told people (or I know I did) was because if we did have to do through that ordeal, I would want, and need to support from everyone and anyone I could get. I know most people wait til they are at the point I am now. Where your past the miscarriage stage, and just about to hit your 3rd month and 2nd trimester. I know I could have waited, but I didn’t want to incase we had any issues. I know I would rather people know early and be there to support me, than no one knowing and having to deal alone.

Speaking of where I am in my pregnancy, I have an appointment in like 10 days and this will be the first of two tests (consisting of blood work and ultrasound) to see about genetic defects. They test for a few different conditions. The one big one is to determine is the child carries the extra chromosomes to be affect by Down Syndrome, which is a condition that affects them in many ways and later on in life can lead to more diseases and illness if they make it to their adult life. The second big thing they test for is Spina Bifida which is problem where the spine hasn’t fused closed properly. There are two other things they check for, one being Cystic Fibrosis which occurs in 1 in 2,500 children born in the United States. CF causes lung, intestinal and pancreatic ailments, which results in numerous extensive hospital stays, and a shortened life expectancy.  The last thing they test for is Tay-Sachs, which is a devastating and untreatable neurological condition that leads to death in early childhood. They say that around 5 months old, the child will start to lose motor skills, then later develop seizures. Death normally occurs around 4 to 5 years of age.

So last night my husband and I were speaking on these tests I will be having done, and what it means for us. If we found out our child had any of these conditions, would be choose to keep it and know that unlike most children, we would either be responsible long after their 18th birthday, or lose them before their 6th birthday. Or would we go the route that neither of truly believe in, and abort and try again. I am not sure honestly what I would do if I had to pick today. I know I would need some time to think everything out, and talk to people, but it would be a hard choice either way. Like Mike my husband said, which one is worst? Aborting a baby now knowing it could die before their 6th birthday, or having a child with a condition that could and probably would tear our marriage apart and raising that child well past their 18th birthday. I don’t know what the right choice is, but I would love to hear your opinion on it.